Everyone parents differently — but is there an expectation that the children return the “favor”?

If your parents treated you to nice things like vacations and extracurricular activities when you were a child, would you think it was perfectly normal to pay for their vacations and other expenses when you were all grown up?

This Redditor shares how much he does for his mother, but he thinks she expects too much. Is he right?

See the story below to get a better idea.

AITA for telling my mom that I’m not responsible for her?

Ever since I graduated college and started making money, my mom expects me to financially support her.

I treat her often because I appreciate all she did raising me, but it feels like she uses that as a lifelong excuse.

She really expects OP to pay for a lot of things.

She asked me to pay rent when I lived at home, so I moved out.

When she visits me in the city (at her own request), she expects me to pay for all meals because she’s the guest.

If she gives me a ride (even though I insisted on taking the train back home), she expects lunch or a gift in return. Because she drove me.

I never asked her to??

The OP has quite a list of expenses they already cover.

It’s not like she doesn’t have money—she constantly buying luxury items for herself, but she acts like treating me is “a waste.”

I’m already covering our family’s phone plan, my parents’ and our pets’ insurance.

I’m grateful that I’m in a position where I can afford to provide for them while also maxing out my 401k and investing, but I also want to prioritize my own future.

She guilt-trips me constantly with, “We paid for your childhood, now it’s your turn.”

But then, a European vacation was on the table.

We’re planning a Europe trip that she suggested, and when it came time to book, she just stared at me.

I ended up offering to cover everyone’s flights and hotels.

But instead of being thankful, she acts like it’s expected.

The mother’s reasoning?

She was like, “oh yeah we payed for all the family trips when you were little.”

When I brought it up, she got defensive, saying she deserves to spend her money on herself now as she sacrificed so much for us while we were young.

She paid for our sport lessons, tutors, vacations, etc., and I’m selfish for not doing this one thing for my family.

Oh, but the mother wasn’t done there.

What really got to me was when I asked for input on the trip plans and she replied, “I planned everything when you were kids. Now, it’s your turn.”

That made me snap.

I told her, “You chose to be a mom. I didn’t ask for any of that. I’m grateful, but you can’t keep throwing it in my face. You’re going on this trip, too. I’m happy to plan the itinerary but contribute to it.”

So, now? The silent treatment.

She hasn’t replied, and we haven’t talked in a week.

Am I just being bratty?

Are adult kids really supposed to shoulder this much for their parents if they provided a lot during childhood?

Is this normal? The OP is looking for some guidance on this unusual matter. Perhaps, Reddit’s comments can help. Let’s read them below.

People recommended canceling the trip.

They also mentioned that raising the OP was her legal responsibility.

And finally, they recommended the OP just let the mother “be mad about it.”

This mother needs to check herself.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.